Capitalism Saved My Life (A Little)
Thank you, Coca-Cola-vending-machine-price-setting minions of The Great Carmel-colored Caffeine Cartel! You have saved my life through judicious use of stupidity and a preternatural ignorance of market forces! It’s almost as if you used gravity to help me not fall, only not.
You see…
- You’ve priced your 20-ounce beverage, delivered not at all gently from the bowels of your ghastly machine, at one-and-a-quarter American dollars.
- You appear incapable of managing the change-giving capability of your ghastly machine, thus leaving your customers obliged to gather that stray quarter or lose three.
- Americans aren’t Europeans, but we still don’t care much for cash, let alone coinage.
- ∴ I won’t be purchasing a 20-ounce Coca-Cola today, and not at all likely tomorrow.
- ∴ You have saved my life (a little).
I liken this to movie distributors pulling the least enticing parts of their movies for trailers, though, to be sure, that’s quite a bit more difficult.
No Comments Yet